My Office Elevator

My office is all of 9 floors, but the maximum time I spend, after my desk and pantry, is in the lift lobby. There are 6 functional elevators, neatly arranged in 2 rows, 3 on each side. The elevators are extremely efficient in blocking any network invasion. However, I still have colleagues desperately trying to scream, “Hello hello, Awaaz aai?” to their prospective love interests or “In the lift. Bye”, to their wives or mothers alike. As if they were caught off-guard and they never knew elevators have jammers. Is it to ensure no extra weight? Just another lifting thought. The expressions in the elevator, at each point in the day, are a very accurate indicator of how the person’s day has been in office. Morning, 10:00 am: Nobody wants to look at the floor number on the display. They wouldn’t mind hanging around, and shuttle to and fro a couple of times more. Some look as drowsy as they were when they woke up, (Mumbai offers its inhabitants some good time to nap on the roads, quite literally) or look freshly drowsy after getting off their swanky air conditioned cars. But no one wants to get out of the elevator. We all stare at the floor with perfect unison. Lunch, 1:00 pm: The lift is noisy with several sets of parallel conversations. The air is filled with the smell of chutney, sour curd or bhindi masala. They are all staring at the floor display, and frown each time the elevator opens to welcome some more lift-mates. Each stoppage means a few seconds of the coveted break wasted. Why couldn’t we just have smart elevators? I mean who risks upsetting hungry humans. Not even, your…you know whom. Tea, 4:00 pm: That is when the personal life takes the back seat and you are soaked in the office air. The corridor gossip travels to elevators, fully unaware that the stranger next to you is “watsapping” every word, with expressions of course to his car pool friend, who also happens to be your manager. People discuss their ETA home, how tired they are with same routine work or workplace. Wonder if they are tired of their constant monotonous breathing also. Snacks, 6:30 pm: The elevator is literally painted green with jealousy, as a few privileged ones press the exit floor button, while the jealous ones head to the cafeteria again. The gossip has matured, and now all they want to know is what time their manager is leaving. They obviously don’t know when they are heading home. The stranger is still “watsapping”. Dinner, 8:30 pm: Green is not evergreen. It has become red with anger. “WTF, you are leaving? Did you finish that note? Ahh, lucky you. I am here for a few more hours”, the angry bird says as she sees her friend heading home while she decides to take a dinner break. Her hair is awry and kohl smudged up. Her awaited dinner date turned into a 20 minute dinner break. Both of them are staring at the sky, one getting ready to nap in the bus again, another one looking hard for stars. She might just be leaving at sunrise. Dreaded, 2:00 am: Looks like we have come full circle. The angry bird is sleepy. She looks as drowsy as she did when she came, not looking at the floor display. She is staring at the floor, wondering if she should just crash at the carpeted elevator. Happy Elevating!!